It's often been said that the number one fear that people suffer from is speaking in public. What is not quite as well known is that the second most popular fear is speaking to strangers. You only have to walk about during the day in a busy city to appreciate this. A buzzing metropolis of people going about their day with little awareness or apparent interest in the people they pass. It's hardly surprising though given that we are culturally conditioned from a young age to believe statements like, 'Silence is golden', 'Wait to be properly introduced' or 'Don't talk to strangers'.
Perhaps these well intentioned commands had a place and function when we were young but in adulthood they mostly hinder the way we interact with other people. In the field of social psychology there is a specific kind of experiment called a breaching experiment which was made popular by the work of sociologist Harold Garfinkel. A breaching experiment is where you behave in a way that breaches the 'normal social fabric'. At least what we have been online s without registration conditioned to believe is 'normal' socially. An example could be walking up to a shop assistant with a piece of clothing and start haggling for a better price or walking into MacDonald's and asking for a sirloin steak, medium rare with a side order of vegetables. Both of these examples breach what is considered in those situations to be 'the social norm'.
The strange thing about breaching experiments is that, when you do one for the first time, it is an incredibly scary experience. The reality is that you are completely safe but you respond as if something terrible might happen. However, once you have done a few in succession, a strange thing starts to happen.You reach a point where this fear suddenly melts away.It's kind of like you are gradually peeling back the layers of fear and then, all of a sudden, you realise that they never actually existed in the first place. It's a strange yet tremendously liberating experience that I'd recommend to anyone. When it comes to talking to strangers, to a certain extent, many people have bought into the illusion that it's like breaching some social norm and, as such, find it a terrifying experience the first times they do it.
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